beauty · Christian · feminism · feminist · Hope · Mental Illness · racism · sexism · Uncategorized

Red Wine and Ambien  

(I am not speaking out against medication. I am not a doctor. I am a strong believer in the use of medication)

How many of you take medication to help you sleep?

How many of you take it because you can’t turn your brain off?

How many of you take a pill to help calm you down?

How many of you self medicate to treat either of these symptoms?

Welcome to the 70% of America folks.

Now, I could go down the rabbit trail of my personal theory of Maslow’s Hierarchy and how meeting our basic needs with ease causes us to “self create”( I say that super loosely) issues to solve. But no one came here to meet Alice for Tea with the Mad Hatter right? Since I’m not actually a psychologist, let me cut to the chase and  share with you some basic reasons why you’re miserable.

Reason number one : you suck

….no no no…. I’m just kidding. Just trying to keep your attention because I’m sure you’re snoozing on the science talk above.




 

I’m not really gonna go in order of anything. Just going to give you some thoughts so just hang tight till the end.
So this is how we live our lives. In small steps, daily steps:

  • Clock in
  • Clock out
  • Repeat
  • Watch tv
  • Check social media
  • Maybe hangout with someone
  • Maybe just go to bed (hey, that’s me! Bedmister)

In the broader since this is what we (typical-again saying this loosely) do:

  • Go to school(s)
  • Get a job(s)
  • Get married (maybe a couple of times till you get it right)
  • Have a kid(s)
  • Tell said kid(s) they can do anything. They can change the world even
  • Put kid(s)  in little league
  • Put kid(s)  in school
  • Tell kid(s) to get job
  • Scoff at kid(can I stop doing the “s” now?) who doesn’t want to live the mundane life and tell kid to grow up
  • Kid gets job and repeats the process

Now why do we do that? Why do we live such mundane lives and tell our kids to reach for the starts only to at some magical age cut it down? Because we expect for “adults” to be jaded about the world and give in. If you’re not jaded than you’re abnormal. Children are free from taxes, trying to get mortgages, getting their heart broken, again and again.

We’re excepted to be either self medicated or actually medicated. Now I’m not talking about real biological needs for medication. Trust me I know that sometimes your body needs that boost to get back on its feet or to stay steady on its feet. Either way it’s not wrong. But are we putting ourselves in situations where our bodies our failing us emotionally?

We’re so full that we’re empty.

We aren’t doing anything with our lives. We either live lazy, self centered lives to keep from being intangled by the stresses of “life”  or were constantly stressed out. There’s so much house work, so much work at work, so much drama here, so much, so much.  Honestly either way we’re self centered.

We’ve pushed the issues of the world so far out of our heads because it stresses us out. Because there’s nothing we can do. We don’t realize someone is pulling at the hems of our clothes trying to capture our attention for help. How can we help someone if we need so much help ourselves?

Here’s my over simplified answer that will equally tick all of you off. Love. That’s all I know to do is love.

Do I get stressed out easy? Yes. Can I fix everything? no. Does that stress me out? Yes.

Let me tell you what’s it’s like to not give up and give into to being jaded as an adult. Let me telling what’s it’s like to still wanna change the world.

It’s loney. Sometimes you feel like the only one. Sometimes you are the only one you can see. There’s a lot of nights spent crying because it seems impossible . There’s a lot of night spent reading, studying, learning all you can.  Your eyes start see pain everywhere. Your eyes start to see light everywhere others can’t see. You see light in the hopless. You somehow always feel helpless, hopeless, powerful, and happy at the same time. You’re constantly in fear you’re too late, underqualified, or just crazy. You’re restless and every fiber of your being wants to fight the mundan.

Why do we decide not to live like that? Well a kids movie just explained it to me (Zootopia) “it’s easier to give up on your dreams. It’s easier to be complacent.”

So say you want to join the dreamers and changers. Say you want to fight the mundane. How do you? Love.

Yes, just love.

Love shows you what to do. It shows you what not to do. It cares for others. It cares for you. Love shows you the coworker that’s going through a hard time. Love can help mend them. Love mends your own broken heart.

 Love is the easiest and the hardest thing to do.

Love is the only thing that I , as an extreme dreamer, hold on to. I fight everyday to show extreme love to everyone I can. I fail all the time but I get better. Love moves like a flood. If you have it and share it then the next person does the same and the next the same. Suddenly you’ve made a difference.

Once you’re so empty that you’re full you need less and less of the other things to fill you up.

You don’t need that wine to relax. You don’t need that Xanex, this time to breath.  You don’t need to be alone all night on your phone or watching tv. You don’t need to be stressed all the time or destress all the time.

Hard words to live by. I still truly  can’t. But I will tell you I’ve lived life both ways: and the way of love is a lot better.

I can’t tell you how to live it. That you have to figure out. I can tell you someone, somewhere is begging for your love. Whether it’s right next to you  or worlds away. Someone is pulling at your Skirt tails. It’s not always easy.  But trust me it’s worth it.

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